Hi All,

I awoke this morning in a whimsical mood, having been dreaming a dream in which a hockey puck was moving between parallel walls. In my half slumber I came up with the following problem. Unfortunately for you, you have come to mind. You do not have to solve this problem to remain my friend. Some of you will make an amusement of this. Others will be annoyed. Whether or not you are amused or annoyed is a test of your personality and a test of your general level of joviality.

Problem:

There is a planet named Trizebulax. Trizebulax has a green sky. On Trizebulax there lives a Tuxedo Cat named Spatz. The gravity on Trizebulax is 1/2 the gravity on earth. Spatz has a girl friend named Felicia. Felicia is a cat. On Trizebulax there exists a horizontal floor supporting two parallel vertical walls spaced 16 inches apart. The atmosphere of Trizebulax is comparable to the atmosphere of Earth. We don't know why the sky is green on Trizebulax. Resting on the floor half way between the two walls is a hockey puck with a diameter of 4 inches. Spats eats cat food. Felicia eats table scraps. Static and dynamic coefficients of friction between the hockey puck and the floor are .5. We don't know the weight of the hockey puck. Spats takes afternoon naps in the shade of a blue tree. The coefficient of restitution between the hockey puck and the walls is .5. Felicia has 10 whiskers emanating from her whisker pinches. The hockey puck has been travelling at right angles to the walls. Having lost one of his whiskers, Spatz has 9 whiskers emanating from his whisker pinches. The hockey puck has been in contact with the floor for three weeks. Felicia is a Persian. The hockey puck has just come to rest. All of Spatz's remaining whiskers are black. The hockey puck is made of Delrin. The whisker that Spatz lost was white. The floor is varnished with Old Master Spar Varnish. The walls are painted with yellow Kem-Tone. Spats no longer owns the whisker that fell out.

For 90% credit: What was the speed of the hockey puck just before the second bounce before coming to rest? Show your work.

For 2% credit: Who do you think will be President of the United States on January 21, 2017?

For 2% credit: What is your explanation for the sky of Trizebulax being  blue?

For 2% credit: What is the combined number of whiskers still present in the whisker pinches of Felicia and Spatz?

For 2% credit: What would you think of a coefficient of restitution of 1.5?

For 2% credit: Do you like the names Felicia and Spatz?

For extra credit: What are the apogee and perigee (maximum and minimum altitudes) of the elliptical orbit of Kragulon, the smallest moon of Trizebulax?

You are doing this test on the honor system. You have 15 minutes to complete your work.